Jack of One Trade and Master of it!

The Spew Yawker

…..Think it!….Quip it!

November 11th, 2015

Misplacement in a Displacement Kind of Way


There’s a reason why the over fifty years old cannot cut it in today’s constantly evolving ‘www’ environment because they are stuck in a time warp when ‘Back to the Future’ was Sony's Walkman's curren curtain call and the View Master was 3D’s contender for the digital divide. Gone are the days when the division of labor was about Jill being Jack of all trades and master of none. Now comes the days when robots are the masters of the universe.



Look, here is John Brown, and no, not the one whose baby had a cold upon his chest and he rubbed it with Camphorated Oil, but John Brown, an educated high flier of the 70’s and 80’s with all the trappings of a Jamaican upper middle class upbringing. Upload and fast forward to 2015, downloaded on his luck with an unsharpened 1970 saw. Yet, he wonders why things are not working out for him, every wey im tun makka juck him, sah! But he has not figured it out yet, how to copy and paste.

Suh, Mi Nuh Badda Badda Bredda! Because John Brown allows the sucking sound of his past to control the circumstances of his future.



  1. A few years ago, Benita Johnson was selling Organo Gold Coffee. To this day, I can’t tell you the BENEFITS of this product, but I can tell you all the ostentacious pictures of loads of cash, fancy cars and big houses that consumed his message, hence, I dare say I vividly remembered the glitter and glam of his wants and needs, not the benefits to the needs and wants of the consumer! 

Knowing that the nature of the beast dictates that you are as good as your last act, deed or sale is tantamount to Adele’s number one hit, ‘Hello’.

  1. Back to John Brown, my initial assessment of his age related lackadaisal attitude was that he’s never in his early life had to develop his innate survival skills. For one, he married the wrong woman for the wrong reasons. Two, he possesses the personality of a devoted kum-bah-yah follower and chose a profession that goes for the juggler. Yet, Brown wants to break into the sales business.
  1. OK Brown lacks curiosity, drive and initiative and that for anyone are nonstarters. So, Brown says he’s an ologist that does some kind of foot masseuse that supposedly should help blood circulation, and my first instinct was, I don’t believe the target market is too concerned with their blood circulation, unless of course, it prevents and cure something or make them young again. I proceeded to tell him that when it comes to alternative medicine of any sort, people in his age group are looking to reduce their blood pressure and lower their blood sugar levels. Middle aged men are looking for a miracle to get their rocks hard, and the rest, the fountain of youth. Middle aged women on the other hand, are looking for the bodies of their lost youths. His response was that the multilevel marketing company he’s affiliated with, sells vitamins. Suh, mi noh badda!


  2. Suffice it to say, Brown put out a few teasers on his Facebook page about his massage business attempt, no body bit, because the pitch lacked information, benefits and a unique selling preposition. Most importantly, a reason to act, like or respond.
  1. We are not taking about a person with a Bhutto buckle on his belt, or are we? Brown is a great clinical writer, a product of his buttress high school education, however, to my chagrin, he would post pictures on Facebook without a mention of relevance with respect to what, who, why or where. such a missed opportunity to show case his talent. Granted, Brown is from the old school of regurgitation in which his ability to think outside the system that imprisons his mind, thereby, stifles his own personal growth.
  1. Nonetheless, out of desperation, Brown became an independent business owner with a major Multi Level Marketing company (MLM). Of course, what you know? I would be so lucky to be one of his first test subjects of a social experiment, and the jury is in:
  1. He goes live and direct as an Independent Business Owner (IBO)
  2. In his personal email to me, it’s impersonal to say the least, and felt pressured  to buy something I don’t care about, 
    1. He’s assumed I knew about the products or the story of the company
  3. Brown proceeded to make his recommendations as to which products I should try, yet, he knows nothing about  my buying habits to make an uneducated guess at purchasing suggestions. At no point in his email did he mentioned the benefits to me for buying what he was selling, but he certainly did not forget to mention his desperate need to feed his family. Never make your sales pitch about you!!!
  4. So, I clicked on the link and I immediately saw where the company had not bothered to update its website’s copyright year of inception to present
  5. Brown did not try to give his shop a catchy and memorable name such as Box, Bite and Brown
  6. The site was just not that interesting to begin with, the product offerings were sketchy, the prices were in American dollars, notwithstanding that he as selling to Jamaican consumers. Most lacking of all, were customer reviews and the feel of warmth of the site. Suh mi kiss mi teet and mozy along to look at the same products on Amazon.com.
  7. Did I mentioned that the prices were off the charts compared to the competition.? The company claims that they sell premium products, thus, the premium prices. I won’t dispute that claim, but Brown is selling to a target market that perceive  the Dollar Store's detergent just as good or better than expensive branded detergents.




  1. It goes without saying that Brown had not done his homework and thoroughly researched the needs of his target audience.
    1. You’ve got to understand your customers’ psychological behavior. You yourself has got to hone your soft people's skills and the hard selling skills too, that is, ‘Made to Stick’ value added; for example, BMW’s tagline, ‘The ultimate driving machine’ and Checkers' slogan 'You've got to eat'
    2. You cannot be hawking something without a personal testimonial of connecting with one of the points of SUCCES – Simple, Unexpected, Concrete, Credible, Emotional and Stories
    3. OK, the company sells highly concentrated cleaning agents such as laundry detergents. The missises in the hills of St. Andrews are not going buy premium products so that their helpers can siphon them off.
    4. People on  shoe string budgets are not too concerned with environmentally friendly products. You can shop at Price Mart for a fraction of the price and still maintain a middle class lifestyle.
  1. In such a crowded market place where consumers have access to information at the push of a button, you have to carve out a niche with a carefully crafted sales message of conviction that resonates with your target audience
  2. Say I were to give Brown the benefits of my expertise, I would suggest to him to push the company’s air purifiers, besides the higher markup. commission and higher points gained, when it comes a child’s ailments, and a parent's sacrifice. Think love and guilt! 

At the end of the day, Sex sells. Hope sells. Envy sells. How does this help you when the horse has already galloped through the gates? Beats me, but I can tell you, if you find that one thing you are passionate about, you will effortlessly become great at it.

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